Overcoming the Orphan Mentality, Part 2: Breaking the Orphan Spirit Cycle Through Propitiation, Justification, & Adoption

The Orphan Spirit Cycle:

Father Wound: Early experiences of rejection or lack of love.
The Orphan Spirit incorrectly believes: “I must earn my worth through performance”.
The Orphan Spirit subsequently fears: “If I fail, I will be condemned, punished, or abandoned.”
This results in the following behavior: “I strive, compete, and control my environment to avoid failure.”
Consequently: Identity is tied to outcomes, not to God’s unchanging love.

Adoption through propitiation dismantles the orphan spirit as the Christian breaks the orphan spirit cycle, by believing in the truths of propitiation, justification, and adoption, and subsequently choosing not to pursue steps 2-4 of the orphan spirit cycle.

How Propitiation, Justification, & Adoption Contradict the Orphan Spirit

I. Performance-based identity: incorrectly believing worth is earned through behavior.

Those with a performance-based identity attempt to “measure their value in God’s eyes by their actions, obedience, or achievements”. Performance-based identity is the “belief that a person’s worth, closeness to God, or spiritual standing is determined by what they do – such as praying more, serving more, giving more, or producing measurable results – rather than by who they are in Christ.”

“Justification is the forensic, legal act whereby God declares a sinner righteous, not on the basis of their own moral performance or works, but through the imputed righteousness of Jesus Christ.”

“In justification, the believer’s sin is imputed to Christ on the cross, and Christ’s perfect obedience is imputed to the believer”. Every believer is declared righteous forever, regardless of performance.

Justification Quotes:

“To be justified means more than to be declared “not guilty.” It actually means to be declared righteous before God. It means God has imputed or charged the guilt of our sin to His Son, Jesus Christ, and has imputed or credited Christ’s righteousness to us” (Jerry Bridges).

“Justification is away beyond anything that a human court of justice ever realizes… giving him a standing in the merit of Jesus Christ of absolute innocency before God” (A. C. Dixon).

“Through the death of Christ on the cross, making atonement for sin, we get a perfect standing before God. That is justification, and it puts us, in God’s sight, back in Eden before sin entered. God looks upon us and treats us as if we had never sinned” (A. C. Dixon).

“It is entirely by the intervention of Christ’s righteousness that we obtain justification before God. This is equivalent to saying that man is not just in himself, but that the righteousness of Christ is communicated to him by imputation, while he is strictly deserving of punishment” (John Calvin).

“God does not justify us because we are worthy, but by justifying us make us worthy” (Thomas Watson).

“Indeed, this is one of the greatest mysteries in the world – namely, that a righteousness that resides with a Person in heaven should justify me, a sinner on earth” (John Bunyan).

“We are justified, not by giving anything to God, – what we do, – but by receiving from God, what Christ hath done for us” (William Gurnall).

“Justification is… a completed fact for the believer; it is not an ongoing process” (John MacArthur).

Am I doing enough to be accepted?

“Justification establishes acceptance precedes performance as God legally credits the perfect life and active obedience of Jesus Christ to the believer’s account” (AI).

“Because our righteousness is external to us (resting entirely in Christ), our conscience is set free from the terrifying anxiety of trying to measure up to God’s standards. The believer no longer performs for acceptance, but from acceptance” (John Calvin).

Since propitiation was enacted to satisfy fully the wrath of God of all the sins we would ever commit in our lifetime, because we chose to receive God’s grace through salvation, we became justified forever, received propitiation, and subsequently became a child of God through adoption. Being justified, having now Christ’s righteousness in us, God will always perfectly accept and love all His adopted children just as He does Christ:

“And when Jesus was baptized, a voice from heaven said, “This is my beloved Son, with whom I am well pleased” (Matthew 3:17).

Since we are legally declared righteous every time we sin, because our perfect father always sees the righteousness of Christ in us every time we sin, the perfect grace and mercy will always choose to accept us as He accepted Christ, for God’s holiness and justified has been forever satisfied by the cross, and it has always been God’s desire to accept us like Christ.

Therefore, the Christian orphan spirit no longer needs to produce their own righteousness, or to perform, to be accepted by Him: “God’s love for us does not depend on our performance or achievements; it is rooted in His character and His choice to call us His children” (Timothy Keller).

“Breaking free requires a fundamental shift in understanding. Our value to God isn’t based on what we do but on who we are – His beloved children. This identity was secured not by our performance but through Christ’s finished work. As we begin to grasp this truth, the exhausting cycle of striving for approval gradually gives way to resting in acceptance” (Clay Hess).

II. Fear of punishment/condemnation: fearing God’s wrath or rejection.

“Propitiation removes the basis for fear of God’s wrath”.

“And He is the propitiation for our sins: and not for ours only, but also for the sins of the whole world” (1 John 2:2).

Christ died on the cross to pay the penalty of all the sins of the world; those who accepted Christ as their Savior have been forgiven eternally, as propitiation entirely satisfied God’s wrath for good of all the sins of all His adopted children.

From propitiation, we became justified forever, in which God declares us legally righteous, meaning we will always be considered innocent in God’s eyes, giving God no judicial reason whatsoever to condemn or punish us. Because of adoption, we are God’s children, and because it is God’s nature to always perfectly love all His children, and since God is full of grace and mercy, we need not to fear God’s wrath, punishment, or condemnation anymore.

“The Lord is merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in mercy” (Psalm 103:8-10).

“There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” (Romans 8:1).

Understanding God’s Discipline Properly

God sometimes may discipline us out of love when we sin. God’s discipline isn’t abusive punishment or wrath being demonstrated on His child. Motivated entirely by love, God’s discipline is unfounded in control, fear, or harm.

The purposes of God’s discipline to His children

Teach right from wrong, build self-control
Guide us toward holiness and righteousness
Build resilience and character, prepare us for life’s challenges
Is temporary and corrective, not permanent punishment

“Divine discipline is never an act of rejection; it is the ultimate proof of our sonship”. God’s discipline is a fatherly correction designed to mold us into successful, victorious children, for our good and His glory. When experiencing God’s correction, we must distinguish between God’s loving discipline and the punishment inflicted by many abusive earthly parents:

God’s Discipline

Intent: To love, guide, and grow
Method: Instruction, correction, boundaries
Outcome: Growth, peace, righteousness
Love: Love is the foundation

Abuse

Intent: To harm, control, dominate
Method: Fear, threats, violence
Outcome: Trauma, resentment, brokenness
Love: Love is absent or twisted into control

Source: (Onward in the Faith)

III. Fear of abandonment: believing God will withdraw love if we fail

God, who cannot lie, promises to all His children: “I will never leave you nor forsake you” (Hebrews 13:5).

When the Apostle Paul wrote about adoption in the Bible, he formulated his message, partially upon the Roman adoption laws during his time:

“A Roman father could disown his natural-born son under extreme circumstances, but he was legally forbidden from disowning or abandoning an adopted son” (AI).

Christians today can be also be “assured of their absolute security in God’s family”. When adopting believers, “God binds Himself to a covenant relationship that legally and relationally prevents Him from every abandoning them” (AI).

“Together, justification and adoption form an impenetrable fortress against the fear of abandonment. Justification provides the objective, legal foundation: God cannot abandon the believer because they are legally righteous in Christ. Adoption provides the subjective, relational reality: God will not abandon the believer because they are His beloved children” (AI).

God Perfectly Loves All of His Children, Including the Orphan Spirit

“Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.” (John 15:13).

We are valuable to God because Christ’s life was the price of our adoption. Romans 5:8 states: “But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners.”

Before we were born, omniscient knew everything about us, everything good and bad about us. In spite of all the bad things we don’t like about ourselves, He still choose to die for us, we are indeed valuable to Him! God chose Christ to die because He greatly desired an intimate relationship with all of humanity:

“Even before he made the world, God loved us and chose us in Christ to be holy and without fault in his eyes. God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great pleasure (Ephesians 1:4-5).

God’s perfect love toward us:

“I have loved you with an everlasting love; therefore I have continued my faithfulness to you.” (Jeremiah 31:3).

“And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love…” (Romans 8:38–41)

“For I, the Lord, do not change; therefore you, O children of Jacob, are not consumed” (Malachi 3:6).

“Even if my father and mother abandon me, the LORD will hold me close” (Psalm 27:10).

Adoption through propitiation:

Propitiation = Christ’s death satisfying God’s wrath against sin.
Justification = God declares us righteous in Christ.
Unconditional acceptance = God’s acceptance is based solely on Christ’s work, not our performance.
Perfect love and faithfulness = God’s love is complete and unchanging, so He will never abandon us.

When we trust fully in God’s perfect love, we need not fear being punished, condemned, or abandoned by God when we are not perfect: “There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love” (1 John 4:18).

“He heals the brokenhearted and bandages their wounds” (Psalm 147:3).

Abba Father says to every orphan spirit with their father wound: “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest” (Matthew 11:28).

God desperately wants to heal you from your father’s wound. “But how do I start?”

Written by Mark DeJesus, here are some important things to consider:

Open up your heart. This seems very simple, but it is many times a closed or guarded heart that keeps God from penetrating. Ask Him to help you in this.
Begin learning what it means to receive love. Everything changes when we learn to receive. Position you heart to say yes to the love that God has for you.
Allow God to heal the poor references you have of Him, which goes back to your earthly father relationship. Give God permission to heal those unhealthy references.
Start by addressing Him as your Father. Jesus came to show you the Father. He is the way to the Father, so begin connecting to who He is as a Father and Dad. Ask Him to show you how to connect to it.
Instead of running from pain and avoiding it, allow God to love you in those areas where you hurt. Trust Him to lovingly work in your heart.
Be open to the people God sends into your life. These connections can become catalysts for healing. Many times, when we ask for His love, He will send someone who will love us. Be open to that possibility.
Practice gratitude regarding the love that God has for you. Gratitude can open up your heart to love like nothing else.”

As we come as a child daily to receive God’s perfect healing despite our doubts and fears, we must trust in the truths of propitiation, justification, and adoption, which has the power to break the orphan spirit cycle. When the Christian firmly trusts in the perfect unchanging love of God which has healing power, overcoming their fears of being condemned, punished, and or abandoned through trust in Abba Father’s perfect nature and character, based upon the adoption through propitiation principle, the Christian can gradually experience freedom from their childhood wounds as they pursue a daily, intimate relationship with Him.

Overcoming the Orphan Mentality, Part 1: Understanding the Situation

Sources:

https://iask.ai/q/healing-father-wounds-and-trusting-God-as-a-perfect-father-q9bgspo

https://iask.ai/q/how-to-heal-from-father-wounds-christian-perspective-0ltumf0

https://iask.ai/q/biblical-principles-for-healing-father-wounds-k57q42o

https://iask.ai/q/scripture-for-healing-father-wounds-jgpb8g0

https://iask.ai/q/healing-from-father-wounds-through-scripture-and-characteristics-of-God-as-a-jekr4v8

https://iask.ai/q/how-can-i-believe-that-god-is-a-perfect-father-in-spite-of-my-father-wounds-ofasou8

https://iask.ai/q/healing-from-father-wounds-through-faith-7ddb638

https://iask.ai/q/what-is-god-s-unconditional-love-like-h8god0g

https://biblehub.com/topical/c/contrast_with_earthly_fathers.htm